Lettre /motivation

Lettre /motivation
Message de pauko972 posté le 14-01-2016 à 18:20:35 (S | E | F)
Bonjour tout le monde!
Je suis étudiant en anglais-chinois et l'année prochaine j'ai choisi de partir en Angleterre via le programme ERASMUS.Et donc il faut pleins de documents administratifs à remettre, dont la lettre de motivation.
Je souhaiterais si possible que vous m'aidiez à donner des corrections s'il y en a s'il vous plait, je vous serais très reconnaissant, car je voudrais vraiment maximiser mes chances avec une bonne lettre de motivation. Merci pour vos réponses.
Voici ma lettre:
Objet : Application- An academic year at the University of Leeds, by Erasmus program

Dear Sir or Madam,

After the International Mobility Conference attending set up by the University of xxx, I have decided to spend one year abroad. Currently, I am studying for my second year English and Chinese languages, so I would like to integrate the University of xxx to realize an academic year via the Erasmus program.

My dream is to be a Stewart, and preparing for the best to concretize this job, making a journey in England represents a phase really major for me. With the Erasmus program and the courses proposed by the University of xxx, I can learn at the same time Chinese courses and also perfect my knowledge in English language and discover a culture which I am interested since my youngest age.

I am curious and motivated, from this program I shall personally be benefited but I do also hope to share my experiences with my comrades, it is exactly " the cultural exchange between countries". So ,the education in your University represents an essential step for my business plan construction.

I am totally available, feel free to contact me for any further information or to schedule an appointment.
Thank you for the attention that you will be giving to my request.
Yours faithfully,
Paul

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Modifié par lucile83 le 14-01-2016 18:58

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Réponse: Lettre /motivation de here4u, postée le 15-01-2016 à 00:13:38 (S | E)
hello !

Objet : Application- An academic year at the University of Leeds, by XXX Erasmus program

Dear Sir or Madam,

After the International Mobility Conference attending set up by the University of xxx, I have decided to spend one year abroad. Currently, I am studying for my second year of English and Chinese languages, so I would like to integratejoin/attend classes at/ the University of xxx to realize an academic year via the Erasmus program.

My dream is to be a Stewart(Flight attendant),. and pPreparing for the best to concretize this job, making a journey in England represents a phase really major for me.(word order) With the Erasmus program and the courses proposed by the University of xxx, I can learn at the same time Chinese courses and also perfect my knowledge in XXX English language and discover a culture which I am interested (tense!)IN since my youngest age.

I am curious and motivated,. fFrom this program I shall personally be benefited XXX XX but I do also hope to share my experiences with my comrades, it is exactly " the cultural exchange between countries". So ,the education in your University represents an essential step for my business plan construction.clumsy.

I am totally available,. Please, feel free to contact me for any further information or to schedule an appointment.
Thank you for the attention that you will be giving to my request.
Yours faithfully,
Paul XXXX

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Réponse: Lettre /motivation de pauko972, postée le 15-01-2016 à 00:47:53 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup pour la correction!!!!
Thank you very much!

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