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Message de mimosalix posté le 31-05-2012 à 16:34:29 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Voici une lettre de motivation pour la recherche d'un stage dans une société ne parlant qu'anglais et plus particulièrement dans le domaine de la finance. Serait-il possible que vous me corrigiez mes plus grosses erreurs s'il vous plait afin que je comprenne ce qui ne va pas.
Merci d'avance !
Subject: Request for an internship
Dear Sir or Madam,
Student in Management of companies and administrations at a university institute of technology in Toulouse, I am currently looking for an internship, for a period of one month from 1 st July 2012 in the field of finance. Indeed, I would like, by means of this internship, to put into practice the many lessons that I have received, and discover the reality of this profession through missions that you will entrust me.
Responsible, dynamic, and curious, I think I can be a useful asset in your establishment. I am also ready to be involved in your structure as I do for my studies.
Furthermore, it would be a great opportunity for me to do this internship in your company, indeed I would see the scope of an European firm and even I would take advantage of my English lessons.
I would welcome the opportunity to discuss further details of the position with you personally.
Yours faithfully.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 31-05-2012 17:33
Réponse: Lettre motivation/Finance de gerondif, postée le 31-05-2012 à 17:21:24 (S | E)
Bonjour,
trois mini détails:
A student in Management of companies and administrations at a university institute of technology in Toulouse, I am currently looking for an internship, for a period of one month from 1 st July 2012 in the field of finance.
Quand on donne un métier, on met "a" devant la profession:
I am a student, I am a teacher, an electrician.
j'aurais écrit: From July 1st,2012 ou alors from the first of July, 2012.
Avec for a period of one month, starting on the first of July,2012 passerait peut-être mieux.
Indeed, I would like, by means of this internship, to put into practice the many lessons that I have received, and discover the reality of this profession through missions that you will entrust me.
Responsible, dynamic and curious, I think I can be a useful asset in your establishment. I am also ready to be involved in your structure as I do (did) for my studies.
Furthermore, it would be a great opportunity for me to do this internship in your company, indeed I would see the scope of an European firm and even I would take advantage of my English lessons.
European commence par un son consonne [j], donc pas de liaison possible, donc pas de n.
I would welcome the opportunity to discuss further details of the position with you personally.
Yours faithfully.
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