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Message de mama62000 posté le 02-11-2010 à 12:21:57 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je dois faire une rédaction dans laquelle je me présente; pouvez-vous me dire si elle est correcte, si des choses ne se disent pas et ce que je pourrais rajouter.
La voici:
Hello ! My first name is Marine. I haven't got any second name, my surname is ****. I'm French. I was born on the 1st of may in 1996 in *****but I live in *****. I'm 14 years old. I'm *** tall. My weight is a secret !! I have long and blond hair. My hair is not really straight but is not really weavy. I'm quite patient. I like watching TV, playing computer, reading book.... My favourite book and film is Twilight. I play dance in ***** with *****. We are 5 in my family. I've got 1 sister and 1 brother. My sister called ****, Who is 12 years old and my brother called ******, Who is 9 years old. My mother called ***, who is 41 years old and my father called ****, who is 42 years old. I've got 1 cat, he's a white male and called Noisette and a dog is a femalle who called Linka.
je vousdrais dire chatain a la place de blond mais je ne sais pas comment on le dit. je vousdrais dire aussi plus tard j'aimerais bien devenir kine.
merci d'avance
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Modifié par lucile83 le 02-11-2010 18:35
+ forum
Message de mama62000 posté le 02-11-2010 à 12:21:57 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je dois faire une rédaction dans laquelle je me présente; pouvez-vous me dire si elle est correcte, si des choses ne se disent pas et ce que je pourrais rajouter.
La voici:
Hello ! My first name is Marine. I haven't got any second name, my surname is ****. I'm French. I was born on the 1st of may in 1996 in *****but I live in *****. I'm 14 years old. I'm *** tall. My weight is a secret !! I have long and blond hair. My hair is not really straight but is not really weavy. I'm quite patient. I like watching TV, playing computer, reading book.... My favourite book and film is Twilight. I play dance in ***** with *****. We are 5 in my family. I've got 1 sister and 1 brother. My sister called ****, Who is 12 years old and my brother called ******, Who is 9 years old. My mother called ***, who is 41 years old and my father called ****, who is 42 years old. I've got 1 cat, he's a white male and called Noisette and a dog is a femalle who called Linka.
je vousdrais dire chatain a la place de blond mais je ne sais pas comment on le dit. je vousdrais dire aussi plus tard j'aimerais bien devenir kine.
merci d'avance
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 02-11-2010 18:35
+ forum
Réponse: Se presenter de gerondif, postée le 02-11-2010 à 15:16:11 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Hello ! My first name is Marine. I haven't got any second name, my surname is ****. I'm French. I was born on the 1st of may(majuscule) in 1996 in *****but I live in *****. I'm 14 years old. I'm *** tall. My weight is a secret !! I have long and blond hair. My hair is not really straight but is not really weavy. I'm quite patient. I like watching TV, playing (avec mon, sur mon)computer, reading book(pluriel).... My favourite book and film is Twilight. I play(un verbe en trop ici) dance in ***** with *****. We are 5 in my family. I've got 1 sister and 1 brother.(mettez deux points si vous énumérez) My sister called ****, who is 12 years old and my brother called ******, who is 9 years old.(là cela ne cadre plus avec I've got two sisters, mettez des verbes) My mother called ***, who is 41 years old and my father called ****, who is 42 years old. I've got 1 cat, he's a white male
je voudrais dire chatain a la place de blond mais je ne sais pas comment on le dit. je voudrais dire aussi plus tard j'aimerais bien devenir kine.
un double click sur châtain vous ouvrira le dictionnaire et donnera brown !!
"je voudrais" en anglais sera le conditionnel du verbe like.
double cliquez sur vouloir, sur devenir et sur kinésithérapeute et vous aurez les ingrédients nécessaires.
plus tard est le comparatif de "late". double cliquez sur tard, et il apparaît !
sinon, ce texte est tout-à-fait correct !
Réponse: Se presenter de mama62000, postée le 02-11-2010 à 15:30:12 (S | E)
merci je vais essayer de faire une suite et je viendrais la noter
Réponse: Se presenter de mama62000, postée le 02-11-2010 à 15:49:56 (S | E)
au lieu de toujours dire par ex my father called *******, who is 42 years old
au lieu de toujours dit who ? qu'est ce que je pourrai dire ?
Réponse: Se presenter de gerondif, postée le 02-11-2010 à 15:58:17 (S | E)
Vous pouvez simplifier: my mother , Sylvia, is thirty-two years old.
ou alors: My mother's name is ............., she is .......years old.
ou alors: My mother is called Sylvia. She is 32 years old.
mais dans votre texte: mon père,appelé Antoine, qui a 42 ans ....ne débouche sur rien il manque la fin de la phrase.
on peut aussi commencer par l'âge: My father is 35. His name is .....
Réponse: Se presenter de mama62000, postée le 02-11-2010 à 16:24:15 (S | E)
je l'ai complete pouvez vous corriger le voila
Hello ! My first name is Marine. I haven't got any second name, my surname is ****. I'm French. I was born on the 1st of May in 1996 in ****. I live in *** in the street of the liberté. I'm 14 years old. I'm ****tall. My weight is a secret !! I have long and blond hair. My hair is not really straight but is not really weavy. I've got my mother blue eyes. I'm quite patient. I like watching TV, playing my computer, reading books , playing guitare and shopping !! My favourites books are Twilight, Blonde and journal d'une princesse. My favourite film is twilight and laughing out loud. I'm not very sportive but I practise dance in **** with*****. We are 5 in my family. I've got 1 sister and 1 brother. My sister called Séléna, Who is 12 years old and my brother called Théo, Who is 9 years old. My mother called Sylvie, she is 41 years old and my father is 42. His name is Philippe. In my maternal family we are many !! I've got 1 cat, he's a white male and called Noisette and a dog, she is a femalle who is called Linka. At a later time I would to become a kine or a Speech therapist. I like math and biology. I don't like german and technology. My favourite color is violet. I like the holiday, this year I went to Sarlat in Dordogne with my family it was great. I have swimming, visited cities ….Every wednesday and holiday I go to Caj with my friend. It's great because we make exits. This is a little party of my life. Bye bye !!!!!!
merci d'avance pour la correction
Réponse: Se presenter de headway, postée le 02-11-2010 à 16:28:51 (S | E)
Bonjour à tous,
J'ai une petite question pour Gérondif dont j'apprécie beaucoup les interventions.
À la place de: "I haven't got any second name", pourrait-on dire: " I have no middle name", juste pour alléger un peu.
Et " My family consists of five people: ............."?
Cordialement.
Headway.
Réponse: Se presenter de gerondif, postée le 02-11-2010 à 17:08:25 (S | E)
Let's go !
Hello ! My first name is Marine. I haven't got any second name (est correct mais voir les solutions de Headway, I have no middle name est en effet plus fluide), my surname(mot rare et surtout écrit dans les formulaires, on dit plutôt family name) is ****. I'm French. I was born on the 1st of May (in) 1996 in ****. I live in *** in the street of the liberté(ne pas traduire les adresses). I'm 14 years old. I'm ****tall. My weight is a secret !! I have long and blond hair. My hair is not really straight but is not really weavy(orthographe). I've got my mother(cas possessif en 's) blue eyes. I'm quite patient. I like watching TV, playing (sur, avec)my computer, reading books , playing ****(I play * golf but I play THE guitar)guitar and shopping !! My favourites books are Twilight, Blonde and journal d'une princesse. My favourite film is (2 films ? alors sujet et verbes au pluriel)(majuscule aux titres de films) twilight and laughing out loud. I'm not very sportive but I practise dance(à mettre en ing au gérondif) in **** with*****. We are 5 in my family(c'est correct: Si vous mettez " there are five of us in our family", ce sera très anglais mais on soupçonnera une aide extérieure: apprenez cette expression pour vous). I've got 1 sister and 1 brother: My sister called Séléna, Who is 12 years old and my brother called Théo, Who is 9 years old. My mother is called Sylvie, she is 41 years old and my father is 42. His name is Philippe. In my maternal family we are many (un peu maladroit)!! I've got 1 cat, he's a white male
Pour Headway,
you are right, I was attracted by the heaviness of "surname" and disregarded the style of "I haven't got any second name", because I was happy that the writer could use any in a negative sentence !!
I prefer "there are five of us in our family" to your solution but it is of course correct.
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