Help/correction story
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Message de fatiati51 posté le 10-06-2022 à 12:09:17 (S | E | F)
Hello,
Please, would you like to help me to correct this short story. Thank you very much.
A trip to Merzouga,
At the end of the school year, the students in our classroom decided to organize a trip to Merzouga.
Merzouga is a small city located in the south-east of Morocco of the Saharan region. Its weather is cold and dry in winter, hot and dry in summer. It is a tourist city of excellence, it welcomes tourists from all over the world for these golden sand dunes.
At six o’clock in the morning, we met in front of the school gate, and we arrived there at about seven o’clock. From the first sight, all things there make us felt that we returned to the ancient time, the trditional clothes, golden sand dunes, houses were short and building with clay, there were a lot of camels and palms, except a few modern building that distorted the beauty of the place. Its true that there was some aspects of modernity, like 4X4 vehicles, quads bike, swimming pool… But in general people kept the traditional aspect of their city. When we arrived, some tourist guides present their services to us, but we already arranged every thing before coming here. After eating our breakfast in a beautiful inn, we wore the Saharan clothes we began to riding camels and taking a tour among the sands into the desert. How wonderful was this excursion, its like we were in the thirteenth century. In the evening, we reached the highest peak in the sand dunes for watching the sunset. At night, we put our tent for camping, we ate our dinner and we slept on traditional songs.
Message de fatiati51 posté le 10-06-2022 à 12:09:17 (S | E | F)
Hello,
Please, would you like to help me to correct this short story. Thank you very much.
A trip to Merzouga,
At the end of the school year, the students in our classroom decided to organize a trip to Merzouga.
Merzouga is a small city located in the south-east of Morocco of the Saharan region. Its weather is cold and dry in winter, hot and dry in summer. It is a tourist city of excellence, it welcomes tourists from all over the world for these golden sand dunes.
At six o’clock in the morning, we met in front of the school gate, and we arrived there at about seven o’clock. From the first sight, all things there make us felt that we returned to the ancient time, the trditional clothes, golden sand dunes, houses were short and building with clay, there were a lot of camels and palms, except a few modern building that distorted the beauty of the place. Its true that there was some aspects of modernity, like 4X4 vehicles, quads bike, swimming pool… But in general people kept the traditional aspect of their city. When we arrived, some tourist guides present their services to us, but we already arranged every thing before coming here. After eating our breakfast in a beautiful inn, we wore the Saharan clothes we began to riding camels and taking a tour among the sands into the desert. How wonderful was this excursion, its like we were in the thirteenth century. In the evening, we reached the highest peak in the sand dunes for watching the sunset. At night, we put our tent for camping, we ate our dinner and we slept on traditional songs.
Réponse : Help/correction story de gerondif, postée le 10-06-2022 à 12:40:09 (S | E)
Hello
Mistakes in blue
A trip to Merzouga,
At the end of the school year, the students in our classroom decided to organize a trip to Merzouga.
Merzouga is a small city located in the south-east of Morocco of the Saharan region. Its weather is cold and dry in winter, hot and dry in summer. It is a tourist city of excellence, it welcomes tourists from all over the world for because of (you express cause, not aim) these golden sand dunes.
At six o’clock in the morning, we met in front of the school gate, and we arrived there at about seven o’clock. From the first sight (at first sight), all things there make us felt(made us feel, you put the preterite on the wrong verb) that we returned(as if we had returned) to
* Vous confondez les trois pour :
1) attribution, pour + nom ou pronom :
Who is this cake for ? This cake is for you, for your sister.
2) pour + verbe à l'infinitif, notion de BUT :
Attention à la question piège :
What are you here for ? Dans quel but es-tu là, tu es là pour faire quoi ? (pour quoi en deux mots !)? I am here to help you. We reached up the highest peak ! What for ? To watch the sunset.
Souvent confondu avec pourquoi en un seul mot qui indique une cause :
Ding Dong !
a) Hello, What are you here for ?
b) I am here to kill you !!
a) But why ?
b) Because somebody paid me to do it .
La cause précède l'action, il est payé avant de venir, le but suit l'action, il est venu pour tuer, ce qu'il fera juste après être venu)
3) pour indiquant une cause ; for + nom or for + ing :
He was arrested for battery and assault.
He was arrested for speeding, for breaking and entering.
Thanks for helping me : Merci de m'avoir aidé
On trouve aussi :
He was condemned for having beaten her /for beating her est plus courant.
Réponse : Help/correction story de fatiati51, postée le 10-06-2022 à 20:36:54 (S | E)
Hello,
Thank you very much gerondif for your help.
A trip to Merzouga,
At the end of the school year, the students in our classroom decided to organize a trip to Merzouga.
Merzouga is a small city located in the south-east of Morocco of the Saharan region. Its weather is cold and dry in winter, hot and dry in summer. It is a tourist city of excellence, it welcomes tourists from all over the world because of these golden sand dunes.
At six o’clock in the morning, we met in front of the school gate, and we arrived there at about seven o’clock. At first sight, all things there made us feel as if we had returned to ancient times, the traditional clothes, golden sand dunes, houses that were short and built with clay, there were a lot of camels and palm-trees, except a few modern building that distorted the beauty of the place. It is true that there were some aspects of modernity, like 4X4 vehicles, quad-bikes, swimming pool… But in general people kept the traditional aspect of their city. When we arrived, some tourist guides offered their services to us, but we had already arranged everything before coming here. After eating our breakfast in a beautiful inn, we put on the our Saharan clothes and we began riding camels and taking a tour among the sands in the desert. How wonderful this excursion was, itw as as if we were in the thirteenth century. In the evening, we reached the highest peak in the sand dunes to watch the sunset. At night, we put up our tent for camping, we ate our dinner and we slept on traditional songs.
Réponse : Help/correction story de gerondif, postée le 10-06-2022 à 23:46:21 (S | E)
Bonjour
In the Saharan region, pas of.
A swimmig-pool, ou swimming-pools au pluriel.
Pluriel pour a few ancient buildings.
Ne pas mettre the devant our Saharan cloches.
Our remplace the.
Our tent au singulier implique que tout le monde dort dans la même.
Our tents si vous en avez plusieurs.
Réponse : Help/correction story de fatiati51, postée le 11-06-2022 à 13:37:09 (S | E)
Hello,
Thank you very much gerondif for your help,
A trip to Merzouga,
At the end of the school year, the students in our classroom decided to organize a trip to Merzouga.
Merzouga is a small city located in the south-east of Morocco in the Saharan region. Its weather is cold and dry in winter, hot and dry in summer. It is a tourist city of excellence, it welcomes tourists from all over the world because of these golden sand dunes.
At six o’clock in the morning, we met in front of the school gate, and we arrived there at about seven o’clock. At first sight, all things there made us feel as if we had returned to ancient times, the traditional clothes, golden sand dunes, houses that were short and built with clay, there were a lot of camels and palm-trees, except a few moderns buildings that distorted the beauty of the place. It is true that there were some aspects of modernity, like 4X4 vehicles, quad-bikes, swimming pools… But in general people kept the traditional aspect of their city. When we arrived, some tourist guides offered their services to us, but we had already arranged everything before coming here. After eating our breakfast in a beautiful inn, we put on our Saharan clothes and we began riding camels and taking a tour among the sands in the desert. How wonderful this excursion was, i twas as if we were in the thirteenth century. In the evening, we reached the highest peak in the sand dunes to watch the sunset. At night, we put up our tents for camping, we ate our dinner and we slept on traditional songs.
Réponse : Help/correction story de gerondif, postée le 11-06-2022 à 18:25:14 (S | E)
Bonjour
it was, pas i twas as if we were in the thirteenth century.
We slept on traditional songs continue à ne pas vouloir dire grand chose.
We spent the evening listening to traditional songs before going to bed.
We went to sleep listening to traditional songs.
Réponse : Help/correction story de fatiati51, postée le 12-06-2022 à 00:14:12 (S | E)
Hello,
thank you very much gerondif for your help.
A trip to Merzouga,
At the end of the school year, the students in our classroom decided to organize a trip to Merzouga.
Merzouga is a small city located in the south-east of Morocco in the Saharan region. Its weather is cold and dry in winter, hot and dry in summer. It is a tourist city of excellence, it welcomes tourists from all over the world because of these golden sand dunes.
At six o’clock in the morning, we met in front of the school gate, and we arrived there at about seven o’clock. At first sight, all things there made us feel as if we had returned to ancient times, the traditional clothes, golden sand dunes, houses that were short and built with clay, there were a lot of camels and palm-trees, except a few moderns buildings that distorted the beauty of the place. It is true that there were some aspects of modernity, like 4X4 vehicles, quad-bikes, swimming pools… But in general people kept the traditional aspect of their city. When we arrived, some tourist guides offered their services to us, but we had already arranged everything before coming here. After eating our breakfast in a beautiful inn, we put on our Saharan clothes and we began riding camels and taking a tour among the sands in the desert. How wonderful this excursion was, it was as if we were in the thirteenth century. In the evening, we reached the highest peak in the sand dunes to watch the sunset. At night, we put up our tents for camping, we ate our dinner and we went to sleep after listening to traditional songs.
Réponse : Help/correction story de gerondif, postée le 12-06-2022 à 11:06:53 (S | E)
I would have rather said :
we went to bed after listening to traditional songs.
we went to sleep after listening to traditional songs could imply the songs were so boring they made you fall asleep.
Réponse : Help/correction story de fatiati51, postée le 13-06-2022 à 00:16:21 (S | E)
Hello,
Thank you very much gerondif for your help.
A trip to Merzouga,
At the end of the school year, the students in our classroom decided to organize a trip to Merzouga.
Merzouga is a small city located in the south-east of Morocco in the Saharan region. Its weather is cold and dry in winter, hot and dry in summer. It is a tourist city of excellence, it welcomes tourists from all over the world because of these golden sand dunes.
At six o’clock in the morning, we met in front of the school gate, and we arrived there at about seven o’clock. At first sight, all things there made us feel as if we had returned to ancient times, the traditional clothes, golden sand dunes, houses that were short and built with clay, there were a lot of camels and palm-trees, except a few moderns buildings that distorted the beauty of the place. It is true that there were some aspects of modernity, like 4X4 vehicles, quad-bikes, swimming pools… But in general people kept the traditional aspect of their city. When we arrived, some tourist guides offered their services to us, but we had already arranged everything before coming here. After eating our breakfast in a beautiful inn, we put on our Saharan clothes and we began riding camels and taking a tour among the sands in the desert. How wonderful this excursion was, it was as if we were in the thirteenth century. In the evening, we reached the highest peak in the sand dunes to watch the sunset. At night, we put up our tents for camping, we ate our dinner and we went to bed after listening to traditional songs.
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